Part of the Neighborhood

Some days my kids strap on their helmets and bike/scooter down the street. I follow them slowly by foot and eventually we make our way about a block down to a street with a cul-de-sac. When we get there, there are already 7-8 kids rolling about on their inline skates, bicycles and scooters. My daughter greets them all, knowing most of them from school, and then my kids instantly add their vehicles to the kid traffic. I hesitantly join the other moms on the sidewalk and try to add to the chatter, although feeling a bit shy.

I often think, "So this is what it's like to be part of a neighborhood..."

Our previous neighborhood, was a bit different. I met our neighbors, but never really chatted with them or let the kids play with their kids. I mean, when your neighbor gets arrested in the middle of the night on your doorstep the conversation starters are a bit different..."Were you the ones who called the cops on me?" "Nope, it wasn't us...Have a nice day." Or when the kids from your complex and the complex next door are egging each other on to "jump off the roof" on a lazy summer day, you tend to make a mental note to not let your kids ever meet those kids.

Not that it was an unsafe neighborhood...just different. Neighbors never dropped by to say "hello" unless they were also asking if we knew whose car was blocking the driveway. If I happened to be outside and a neighbor walked by, greetings were rare. Now people I've never met wave at us and often stop to chat about the weather or random happenings in the neighborhood. They've even stopped me in my car while I'm leaving the driveway, just to say hello.

And you know, I still can't get used to it...the friendliness, the hospitality, the acceptance and immediate trust that I've encountered here. I can't say I feel all that comfortable with it.

There's this unsettling distrust that has permeated my ability to freely socialize that I think may just be common in most (I'll just outright say it) LA people (Los Angeles...not Louisiana). I've been trying to break through that, but I think it will take me a while...I have so much distrust that I even arm the car alarm when it's parked in the connected garage at night. I have this sense of anxiety rather than pleasantry when strangers talk to me at grocery stores. When people I've met for the first time ask for my phone number or email, I recoil inside and wonder for what nefarious reason they want this information.

In the meantime, the kids love being part of a friendly neighborhood...They wave at the neighbors going to the community pool across the street and wave at neighbors walking their canine companions about. They play with anyone at the local park and excitedly socialize at the community events (Yes, there are community events...go figure!). We drive down our hill and they recognize cars that belong to their friends' parents. It's one of those places that you can't go anywhere without running into someone that you know or are familiar with. And everyday at school drop-off and pick-up you see...well...you see everyone.

It's not a bad thing. I'm thankful for the place that we are living in now, and I'm thankful that my kids are happy. Community just doesn't come so easily to me as it might to other people...so I'm learning, and perhaps sometime in the future, wherever we are, I'll be able to feel more like I'm part of the neighborhood, too.